Dear mishi,
It is at times when you feel the most safe that you are reminded of your past and the things that hold you back. such fear and such insecurity... you always tell yourself "oh no, not again Lord" ... it is almost that you think God is putting u thru endless tests, trials, misery... but the matter of fact is that you compromise. You tell yourself that its ok that God is faithful and that you are not. You convince yourself once in a while that many things are in grey areas. Then you regret, because you know that His heart grieves. you know that He sees and He knows even your innermost thoughts, your feelings. even before a word is on your tongue... He knows.
Isit simply human to err, isit human to neglect... is just human to ignore? Many times you're tired, you're just so frustrated at people and ultimately angry at yourself.
Have you lost the first love? You want to tremble in His presence, you want intimacy... but you stop at the door when He invites you into the inner courts.
Haven't you heard? Better is one day in His courts den a thousand elsewhere. Have you spent your days elsewhere? Have you forgotten his everlasting love when you were unloved?
How could you forget His love? How could you forget His mercy?
He satisfies your desires... great is the measure of our Father's love.
Even when you've strayed away, His love has brought you back and found you....
He satisfies.
Yes mishi.... He does.